[Fwd: Dear Tech Support:]

[Derick Centeno]

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Thanks Jules for sending this to me.  At first, I thought it was at 
first in the "sad, but true" category and then figured it was more so in 
the "funny that it is true" category.  Who knows, the way some people 
are there is a help-list in dire need of this information. It may just 
be that Husband 1.0 may be in need of hearing from the latest 
incarnation of Satan and Hellraiser III and get a visit from the 
Cenobites!  Although by the time Satan is done with his system he might 
just yield to the obedient puppy within and treat the Divine Female who 
deigns to live with him as the Goddess she is.

By then, he'll be a fine example for others on how NOT to behave.

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Date: Tue, 27 Jan 2004 09:41:00 -0500
From: Jules <centuryofwomen29@aol.com>
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To: Alison <Smartmouthali@aol.com>, Anthony scardino <ascardino@bear.com>,
   Butch <lwc69@bellsouth.net>, Damian <dwhisk_hotmail@yahoo.com>,
   Danny Alter <dsa315@email.com>, Derick Centeno <aguila@macol.net>,
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   Wayne <DDS10021@aol.com>
Subject: Dear Tech Support:
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I know you've all seen this before, but it's so funny it's worth rereading.
enjoy,
J


Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such
as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable
programs such as NFL 5.0, NHL 4.3, MLB 3.0, and NBA 3.6.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system.
I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, to no avail. What
can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
*******
Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Try to enter the command: "C:/ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME" to download Tears 6.2,
which should automatically install Guilt 3.0. If that application works
as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications
Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, over use of the above
application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5,
Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer
6.1.
WARNING: Beer 6.1 is a very nasty program that will create Snoring
Loudly.
CAUTION: Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall
another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will
crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0, and Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck, Tech Support
__________________________________




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